I am officially a second semester junior…AKA, I am
officially MORE than halfway finished with my college career. How crazy is
that? What a sweet sense of relief I am experiencing. I keep checking my
calendar just certain there is another assignment or another exam to be
studying for. To my pleasant surprise, there is nothing left to do. My textbooks
have been returned, exams have been taken, papers have been written, and many
prayers have been prayed as the chaos of the end of the semester came to a
close. {Insert deep sight of relief here} I am so exhausted, but my brain has
not transitioned to “break mode” yet, so I chose to write down a few thoughts
on the semester…
First Day
Last Day
Wow, what a semester this has been. Part of me feels like my
first day was yesterday and another part is so relieved it was not. Ha!
To say it was a rough start is an understatement. Those first few days I was
seriously considering trading my degree for an MRS Degree and calling it a
day…which still doesn’t sound like too bad of an idea to me. Ha! Those days
were filled with fear of the unknown, desperation to feel like I fit and
belonged somewhere, longing for affirmation of my major and my decision to move
home, feeling super lonely, and battling a serious case of post-summer blues.
Phew, I am so glad those days are behind me! After my (near) mental breakdown,
I began seeing the Lord work in some really beautiful and unexpected ways. From
the very beginning of the semester, I recognized more than ever before, my
absolute dependence and need for Him. As I began the semester, I prayed that
through everything I did, He would be glorified, whether it was through a
conversation or an exam. I'm not one to typically talk about grades but I am a little too excited NOT to share that I got straight A's this semester…my first 4.0 of college. Every semester before this semester I would get just one B. With that being said, I want to publicly give God absolute and full glory for my success this semester and for leading me through every class and every experience. How annoying is that? Ha! I love how much He loves to show off for us
when we stop and let Him.
Once the initial overwhelming and monotonous days of syllabi
reading were over, I started seeing some really exciting differences between UK
and NKU and began having a greater passion for my schoolwork…because my classes
actually mattered! Crazy concept, I know. Ha! I had finally moved past the
general education classes and could finally take some classes that were both
relevant to my major and interesting. By no means was this semester easy, but
boy does it make a difference when you are interested in the classes you are
taking! One of the biggest differences I noticed (academic wise) was how
passionate and knowledgeable my professors were…please notice that I said
professors and NOT teaching assistance. Wow, what a difference that makes! It
was so refreshing to be taught by professionals that had previously been IN the
field. Their passion for education was contagious and inspiring. And…brace
yourself, this is crazy…the professors knew me by name AND went out of their
way to encourage me. Being such a words of affirmation person, this seriously
blew me away. Multiple times throughout the semester, I had professors send me
an email just to encourage me and let me know that they were proud of my
hardwork. Wow. I love UK and will always bleed
blue, but the intentionality of my professors this year served as GREAT
sources of encouragement and made me feel like I belonged at the university.
What a joy it is to say that!
I Actually Feel Like A Teacher…
By FAR my most worthwhile experience this semester was my
Field Experience. Twice a week, I had the honor and joy of loving, serving,
teaching, and leading the sweetest first grade class there ever was (okay, I
may be a little biased). Where do I even begin with these sweeties? I guess I
begin by saying a big THANK YOU to my amazing coordinating teacher, Jill Glass.
What a blessing it was to be able to partner with her this semester and learn
from her! Jill LOVES her students and they love her. I am so thankful for the
way she embraced me right away and shared her students, her skills, and her
time with me. Jill taught me countless things from managing a classroom to
recognizing when a student just needs a hug. She is loving and encouraging to
her students and treats them like her own. It was always so beautiful to watch
her lead and teach them. Collins Elementary School is full of passionate and
compassionate teachers and it is absolutely humbling, contagious, and inspiring
to see the dedication and the love for students so many of the staff exude.
Now to the students…wow. I love them. I don’t know if I
should be worried or thankful that I fell in love with these kiddos in such a
short amount of time. I may have a slight attachment problem on my hands. Ha! Ever
since I began pursuing a degree in elementary education I had assumed I wanted
to work with the younger students and boy was I right! I LOVE the innocence and
sweetness of 6 and 7 year olds. These next few sentences may sound a little
“rose colored glasses,” but I seriously believe these things… I love how
willing they are to learn and how quick they are to love and accept you. I love
their backwards d’s and b’s and their little chicken scratch handwriting. I
love their questions. I love the hilarious things they say. I love how clumsy
they are. I love that they can’t tie their shoes or button their pants. I love
their hugs, oh how I love their hugs! I love being a part of building a foundation
of learning that they will use for the rest of their academic careers and for
the rest of their lives. I love how moldable they are. I love how much they
want to make you proud. I love their precious smiles. Did I mention that I LOVE
first grade and I LOVE these kiddos?
Goodness, as I type this I cannot stop myself from smiling
as I remember some of the precious and hilarious things the kids would say and
ask. That whole, “kids say the darndst things” saying could not be more true.
Ha! Each Thursday I would go with the kids to their PE class and would laugh
out loud at least once every single class. Oh my, it was so precious. The
clumsiness of these kids is enough to make your heart melt. A couple standout
moments in PE were gymnastics day (where we helped every student do a front
roll and handstand…you would have thought they had just won an Olympic Medal),
hula-hoop day (where my ego was boosted as the kiddos thought it was the most
amazing thing that I could hula-hoop, Ha!), and rock climbing day (while these
sweet babies are only 6-7, holding them up to the rock wall as they nervously
went from rock to rock was a serious workout for this 5’2 girl). So precious.
So hilarious.
- First grade hugs are the best! Their little “sneak-attack”
hugs and love make your heart melt.
- Kids think they are super sneaky and clever…they haven’t
discovered yet that teachers (like moms) have eyes in the back of their heads.
- First grade
whispers are definitely not whispers.
- Putting an imaginary bubble in your mouth is more effective
than you would think.
- I am not sure if first graders can ever be completely quiet
or sit completely still…it is hilarious how squirmy and squirrely they are.
- It is okay to be a little OCD in the classroom.
- I am a little more OCD than I once thought.
- “Goldfish are crunchy.”
- Kids only have to go to the bathroom AFTER the opportunity
has passed.
- KTIP Lesson Plans are totally overrated.
- Hearing “Miss Emilee” makes my heart happy.
- Homemade cards from kids are enough to make you melt.
- Tennis shoe strings are a serious struggle.
- Calling “bottoms,” “buckets” is so much cuter.
- Little girls are completely unaware when their little
buckets are exposed…not sure how many times I said, “Pull your pants up, baby.”
- Children
laughter is contagious.
- “It would be silly to enunciate the double consonants at the
end of words” (example: gla-s-s).
- Sometimes I don’t want to correct kids when their b’s, d’s,
and well…every other letter is backwards because it’s so cute. But I do anyway.
- Sometimes you have to play the “bad guy.”
- First graders cry. Quite often. Sometimes it’s pitiful,
sometimes laughable, and sometimes ridiculous. Regardless, you hug them.
- Every day is a brand new day and holds the opportunity for
new adventures.
- Kids need to know that you’re “safe” before you can teach
them anything worthwhile.
- No matter how
many times you have gone over procedures, kids will forget them and make up
their own rules and you will have to remind them again…and again…and again.
- Call and response attention getters work like a charm.
- There is nothing better than having reading time with
picture books on the carpet (this was only one of my favorite and most relaxing
parts of the day).
- Listening to first graders read is a wonderful mixture of
absolute sweetness and a little bit of pain (Ha! If you have read with a first
grader, you get this).
- Being called “mommy” on accident is precious even if the
student’s face turns 50 shades of red.
- Elementary school is different than it used to be.
- Kids will push
their boundaries…if we let them.
- Dressing like a “professional” is somewhat overrated in the
classroom…keep it classy, keep it comfortable. You spend more time on your
knees working with a student than you think. High heels are ridiculous in the
classroom.
- Kids are kids.
- There is something to love about every student…even the
“difficult to love” ones.
- I’m going to have to have babies quickly (kidding…nobody
panic) so that my favorite names aren’t “ruined.”
- Sometimes, you have to choose to laugh instead of cry.
- I love teaching. I love kids. I cannot wait to be a teacher.
As the end of the semester crept closer and closer, a part
of me was sad knowing that I would have to say, “see ya” to my sweet kiddos. It
still makes me tear up thinking about leaving on my last day. While I plan on
coming back to visit, there is definitely a sense of loss and (unwanted)
closure to this wonderful chapter. I knew I wanted to do something special for
the kiddos (and Mrs. Glass) to remind them of how special I thought they were
and how much I loved them and my time with them. I thought and thought and
finally decided on a project. The majority of students at Collins come from
pretty low socio-economic homes and are raised in homes much different from
mine…which made leaving them even harder! Knowing this (and being a words of
affirmation gal), I decided to make them a “Word Cloud” of words that described
each student. I loved thinking about what made each student so special and
unique and was so happy with how they turned out.
I came ready and excited with
my gifts and was humbled and surprised by the sweet gifts the class had
prepared for ME. Each student had written and drawn a card for me and gave me a
framed picture of the class holding a (precious handmade) sign that read, “We
Love You, Miss Emilee.” Heart=melted. Tears=happening. Goodness, it was pretty
brutal leaving the classroom for the (not really) last time. I am so thankful
to love and be loved by this class.
I could go on and on. I learned so much during my time at
Collins and grew in immeasurable ways. I went from seriously wondering if
teaching was where God was leading me, to being absolutely certain that I was
created to teach and love on His children. When someone would ask how school
was going, I said every single time, “School is school BUT, I get to work with
first graders and THAT is amazing.” It really was amazing. I believe
wholeheartedly that the Lord orchestrated my time at Collins Elementary and
blessed me with so much affirmation and joy to show me that I am (finally)
where I am supposed to be. Praise Him for that! I am SO excited to have a
classroom of my own someday.
Not So Academic Thoughts…
This semester really could not have been more different than
my past semesters. I could write another 4 pages on the non-academic side of
life in Northern Kentucky, BUT, let’s be honest…if you are still reading this,
you’re a saint. I won’t keep you much longer. Promise.
Dating Life
Oh golly, dating is so much more fun when you actually get
to do life with the person. Ha! Profound, I know. Moving back home was
absolutely the best decision I could have made in regards to my relationship
with my sweet boy. It has been so amazing to see how the Lord has brought our
hearts even closer together and has given us opportunities to learn and grow
together. Amazing. I have LOVED our Friday Fun Days and our sweet days in
between. Oh I am in love. {Warning- vulnerability coming up} My poor boy has
seen me in some pretty…emotional moments. There were countless days that I
would just start crying. For no real reason. Seriously. Talk about being a
stereotypical girl. Ha! Every time I would be overcome by emotion, Darin would
simply hold me, ask if there was something he could do, and hold me some more.
That, ladies and gentleman, is grace. It may not seem like a big deal, but it
is most certainly a big deal to me. In my (many) moments of feeling crazy and
overly emotional, he loved me, prayed for me, and didn’t try to fix
anything but simply let me cry and hugged me. He is a keeper. That is
for sure. It has been SO much fun to discover “our spots” and find a new rhythm
of life together. I love falling more and more in love with Darin and find such
joy in discovering new ways to love and serve him more and better. He is
amazing. And I am thankful. Obviously, I could write pages and pages about him
(and probably will at some point) but I’ll leave you with this, Darin Mirante
is an amazing man, life with him is better than I ever imagined, being in love
is the most wonderful thing I have ever experienced, I am better because of his
love, and I love that today is only the beginning with him.
Life At Home
Leaving Lexington and moving back home with my parents has
been an adventure! There have certainly days that I miss the silliness,
singing, and sweetness of living with the girls, but I have learned (and am
continuing to learn) how sweet this time is with my parents. They are SO
gracious and generous and love me so well. I am so thankful for the way they
have re-opened their home to me and allowed me to live such a comfortable and
sweet life with them. They really are the best! I have loved getting to see
both of them in different lights and have learned to really appreciate the thing
that make them so special. Here is just a quick glimpse into the wonderful
people that Steve and Rhonda Hancock are…
I LOVE how humble my Dad is. He would do anything for anyone
without blinking an eye. I love that he isn’t afraid of what people think and
just does what needs to be done. I love how quick he is to laugh and how often
he laughs at himself. I love how blunt he is…sometimes to a fault. Ha! I love
that he is and always will be a kid at heart. I love how much he values family.
I love how easily excited he is. I love that he loves “old timer” music…the
Gathers. I love how proud of his family he is. I love that he loves adventure. I
love how extroverted he is. I love how silly yet sensitive he is. I love my Daddy-O.
For so many reasons.
I LOVE how much of a servant my Mom is. She loves and serves
people better than most. She is always looking for a way to bless others and
goes out of her way to make life easier for those around her. I love how much
she loves her family. I love how much of a caregiver she is. I love that she is
a mom to so many “adopted” children. I love how passionate and confident she
is. I love how sacrificially she gives of her time, love, money, and resources.
I love how hard she works. I love how much she loves to bless others with her
yummy food. I love how supportive she is. I love how sensible and practical she
is. I love my Momma. I love who God has made her to be.
I am thankful to live with my parents during this stage of
life and am so thankful for the way they love, provide, support, and lead me.
Mom and Dad, thank you for your love!
A Few Perks of Living At Home
Spending time with precious friends who have been in my life for years and who will be in my life for many more years to come. I have loved getting to love on some of my favorite little people this semester and be a part of their lives. I love those sweeties! AND making sweet memories with new friends. I don't have a ton of friends but I sure am thankful for the irreplaceable friends I DO have.
At the beginning of the semester, Darin would always laugh saying I needed to find a hobby…seeing as my primary "hobby" was him. Ha! Well, I (re)discovered my hobby. Reading! I LOVE reading and got pretty hooked this semester. During my spare time and on our many coffee shop dates, I would be a little reading machine. I read 6 or 7 books this semester (all of which were Karen Kingsbury books…HIGHLY recommended). What a fun and relaxing pastime!
Life On A Treadmill
One final thought of the semester…I realize at this point I
am probably talking to myself. Or maybe you have taken a bathroom break and have
returned. Ha! Anyway…
Many times throughout the semester, I have felt like I am
running through life on a treadmill. This is something I have struggled with
for most of the semester and something the Lord has really been teaching me
about. I would be lying if I said I loved being in school. I enjoy learning and
find great value in getting a degree, BUT there are definitely moments when I
get tired of being the only one in my “immediate circle” still in school. Now
everyone who is thinking, “Oh if only she knew…embrace this time while you
can…these are your best years!” I appreciate your advice, but (respectfully)
disagree with you. I would be so sad to think that my years as a wife, a
teacher, and a mom paled in comparison to my days in college. Will they be
harder? Absolutely. But I dream of the day I will get married, have a classroom
of sweet kiddos, and have babies of my own. I am so excited for those milestones and often get frustrated feeling
“stuck” in school. Hence, the treadmill illustration. I have struggled (and
honestly continue to struggle sometimes) with this feeling and have prayed
often that the Lord would give me peace in the moment, the ability to
appreciate this stage of life, and patience to wait until His perfect timing
for those precious milestones. This has been easier said than done, folks. Ha!
But I am learning. I am learning to find value in this stage of life. To
appreciate the simplicity of these days. To appreciate the dating stage,
knowing this is the first and only time I will date. To appreciate the lessons
and memories shared with my parents. To enjoy having intentional time with my
few but amazing friends. To value and appreciate the education I am getting. To enjoy not having the stress and responsibilities of “the real world.” And ultimately,
to appreciate and embrace the moments I HAVE, because these moments are
precious and are all I am guaranteed.
Okay…I am finished. There is my life this semester. A
semester full of emotions, memories, and lessons. A semester full of new
experiences, new friends, and new places. A semester where the Lord showed off
and showered me with reminders of His faithfulness. Thank you, Jesus for being
who you say you are!
